Converting Kate: Review Haiku

Childhood circumscribed
by fundamentalism;
yet Kate still has guts.

Converting Kate by Beckie Weinheimer. Viking, 2007, 312 pages.

Dude, I must be an A-list blogger now

. . . because suddenly I'm getting comment spam. Can't seem to delete it, though I'll keep trying.

The Federalist Papers: Review Haiku

"Justice is the end
of government." Our prescient
founders said it best.

The Federalist Papers by James Madison, Alexander Hamilton, and John Jay. First published 1788. Bantam, 1982, 624 pages.

#8 on The LIST.

Happy Independence Day! (And yes, I totally cheated and didn't read them all. But I did read numbers 10, 51, 67, 68, and 69, which my husband the gov jock told me* are the most important. So sue me.)

*There. Bite me, honey.

The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing: Review Haiku

Expectations: low.
First two hundred pages: meh.
But oh -- that ending!

The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing, Traitor to the Nation: Volume I, The Pox Party by M. T. Anderson. Candlewick, 2006, 351 pages.

#7 on The LIST.

Jack Plank Tells Tales: Review Haiku

Natalie Babbit
can do no wrong. Still, this one
feels a bit bloodless.

Jack Plank Tells Tales by Natalie Babbit. Michael diCapua (FSG), 2007, 128 pages.

Heh.

Apparently my only problem words are "kill" (used twice) and "suck" (used once, but I think they're not counting correctly).

So Totally Emily Ebers: Review Haiku

Setting aside the
thrice-told tale bit, this is a
funny, real-world read.

So Totally Emily Ebers by Lisa Yee. Scholastic, 2007, 280 pages.

The Plain Janes: Review Haiku

Is it wrong to com-
plain, in this format, that too
much is left unsaid?

The Plain Janes by Cecil Castellucci and Jim Rugg. Minx, 2007, 176 pages.

Pants on Fire: Review Haiku

This one's earthy, chaste
(sort of). But after a while,
they all sound the same.

Pants on Fire by Meg Cabot. Harper, 2007, 260 pages.

Bad Tickets: Review Haiku

Hail, Mary Margaret,
full of grace: the Lord's with thee,
but trouble is, too.

Bad Tickets by Kathleen O'Dell. Knopf, 2007, 231 pages.

The Good Husband of Zebra Drive: Review Haiku

Sometimes change can be
a blessing. But sometimes it's
best to just have tea.

The Good Husband of Zebra Drive by Alexander McCall Smith. Pantheon, 2007, 213 pages.

Lean Mean Thirteen: Review Haiku

Toaster bombs, stuffed cats,
and the cable company
(those f**kers). Fun stuff.

Lean Mean Thirteen by Janet Evanovich. St. Martin's, 2007, 320 pages.

Ant Farm: Review Haiku

Lampoon boy makes good,
follows dad's footsteps, writes book.
Nice bathroom reading.

Ant Farm and Other Desperate Situations by Simon Rich. Random, 2007, 139 pages.

The Outsiders: Review Haiku

Groundbreaking, it was:
class warfare for teenagers.
Now, it just seems quaint.

The Outsiders by S. E. Hinton. Puffin, 1967, 180 pages.

#6 on The LIST. Listened to on a Playaway device.

The Three-Martini Family Vacation: Review Haiku

Not so much trip guide
as kick in parental pants.
Pass the gin, Junior.

The Three-Martini Family Vacation: A Field Guide to Intrepid Parenting by Christie Mellor. Chronicle, 2007, 144 pages.

But the Munchkin says I'm Cookie Monster

You Are Bert

Extremely serious and a little eccentric, people find you loveable - even if you don't love them! You are usually feeling: Logical - you rarely let your emotions rule you You are famous for: Being smart, a total neat freak, and maybe just a little evil How you life your life: With passion, even if your odd passions (like bottle caps and pigeons) are baffling to others

The Sesame Street Personality Quiz

Note: Currently reading Sara Miles's Take This Bread and not liking it as much as I thought I would. Maybe I have read too many liberal Episcopal female spiritual journey memoirs. . . Also, jealous of everyone who participated in the 48-Hour Book Challenge. Next year, I swear.

A View from Saturday: Review Haiku

Idealized, maybe;
but rich and warm as a fresh
cuppa tea. Kind Souls.

A View from Saturday by E. L. Konigsburg. Aladdin, 1998, 176 pages.

#5 on The LIST.

Boston Globe/Horn Book Award Winners

Read 'em and weep.

Congratulations to Cybils judge Loree Griffin Burns, whose Tracking Trash was named a nonfiction honor book. Heckuva debut, Loree!

Sins of the Fathers: Review Haiku

Take three Our Fathers
and three pretty messed-up kids;
then pray for them all.

Sins of the Fathers by Chris Lynch. Harper, 2007, 232 pages.

The Rules for Hearts: Review Haiku

Dysfunction junction!
The Real World with iambic
pentameter. Nice!

The Rules for Hearts by Sara Ryan. Viking, 2007, 222 pages.

Full disclosure

So I'm feeling a little awkward about the quasi-anonymity I maintain on this blog. Since I am neither a superhero nor a secret agent, it seems a little. . . well, dumb to cloak myself in a veil of secrecy as though I were some kind of Very Impressive Personage or Dangerous Rogue. Many people, especially those in the Cybils community, already know who I am, and I know some of my authors keep tabs on this blog, too. (Hi, Anastasia!) And after the lovely shout-out from Eisha after we met at my company's open house last week, the Dumb factor is just compounded.

So. Hi. I'm Emily, and I edit books for Charlesbridge.

Careful readers will note that I almost never review any books that my company has published. I feel a little weird about receiving review copies from authors and other publishers, so I won't do that either. (Note to the few folks who emailed me lo these many moons ago about sending review copies: Sorry I just left you hanging in the ether. Sometimes I suck.) I do not aspire to the lofty editblogrial heights of Alvina or Cheryl or Stacy, so don't look here for writing advice or tales from the slush pile. I'll just keep writing silly poems about the books I read, and occasionally write about my kids or post some meme that all the cool kids are doing.

Wow. I feel so much better now.

P.S. Note to aspiring authors: I don't accept or read unsolicited email submissions. Sorry.

Better: Review Haiku

Doctor Gawande
takes the sad state of healthcare
and makes it better.

Better: A Surgeon's Notes on Performance by Atul Gawande. Metropolitan, 2007, 273 pages.

Brave New World: Review Haiku

Who's the real Savage?
I'll never look at khaki
the same way again.

Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. Harper, 1932, 259 pages.

#4 on The LIST.

Sheep and Goat: Review Haiku

Meet Sheep. Now meet Goat.
Simplicity itself, in
translation (they're Dutch).

Sheep and Goat by Marleen Westera. Front Street (Lemniscaat), 2007, 99 pages.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: Review Haiku

Shrill moral lessons
dipped in sugar and coated
with chocolate sprinkles.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl. Knopf, 1964, 155 pages.

#3 on The LIST.

Happy birthday to me

Note to the grounds crew at Fenway:

When the announcer says, after a 2 1/2-hour rain delay, that they'll be trying to squeeze in the game before more showers come through, do you think you could, uh, speed things up a bit and not spend forty-five more damp and chilly minutes combing the infield for the fifteenth time? Some of us have babies to feed at regular intervals.

At least we won. And the beer was free.

Okay, I'll play

Your Score: Pure Nerd

91 % Nerd, 39% Geek, 21% Dork

For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Nerd, earning you the title of: Pure Nerd.

The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful.

Congratulations!

Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

-------
Note: I'm currently reading Barack Obama's The Audacity of Hope, which is interesting but dense and not really bloggable. More LIST items to come soon. (And hi, Auntie G. I am so embarrassed that you're reading this.)

On Wings of Heroes: Review Haiku

Peck, nostalgia king,
captures small-town wartime life.
But will kids read it?

On Wings of Heroes by Richard Peck. Dial, 2007, 148 pages.

You Suck: Review Haiku

It's Moore's f'd-up world;
the rest of us are just glad
we don't live in it.

You Suck: A Love Story by Christopher Moore. Morrow, 2007, 336 pages.

Incidentally:
Munchkin: What's that book called, Mommy?
Me, stalling: Uh . . . it's a love story.
Munchkin: But what's it called? [spelling] Y-O-U-S-U-C-K.
Me: That spells LOVE STORY. Really.
Munchkin: No, it doesn't, Mommy.
Me: Redirect! Redirect! Here's a cookie!

This I Believe: Review Haiku

It takes courage, skill
to state Weltanschauung in
a few hundred words.

This I Believe: The Personal Philosophies of Remarkable Men and Women. Edited by Dan Geliman. Holt, 2006, 281 pages.

Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret: Review Haiku

It's all coming back --
Periods, "we must!" -- and yet
I'd forgotten God.

Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret by Judy Blume. Dell, 1970, 149 pages.

#2 on The LIST.

Cures for Heartbreak: Review Haiku

Mourning becomes her--

Don't let the cover fool you:

This is loss writ large.

Cures for Heartbreak by Margo Rabb. Delacorte, 2007, 238 pages.

Dramarama: Review Haiku

The drama onstage
is nothing compared to all
the drama offstage.

Dramarama by E. Lockhart. Hyperion, 2007, 311 pages.

Boomsday: Review Haiku

All government prob-
lems should have such an
easy solution.

Boomsday by Christopher Buckley. Twelve/Warner, 2007, 318 pages.

To Kill a Mockingbird: Review Haiku

Yep, it still makes me
cry: "Miss Jean Louise, stand up.
Your father's passin'."

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Harper, 1960, 336 pages.

#1 on The LIST.

The Talented Clementine: Review Haiku

No mere paean to
self-esteem: Clementine rocks
and finds her purpose.

The Talented Clementine by Sara Pennypacker. Hyperion, 2007, 137 pages.

Grace (Eventually): Review Haiku

Yes, Jesus loves me:
the foul-mouthed, dreadlocked, grace-filled
hippie tells me so.



Grace (Eventually): Thoughts on Faith by Anne Lamott. Riverhead, 2007, 253 pages.

Elephant & Piggie: Review Haiku

All hail our pal Mo,
whose brilliance makes a virtue
of simplicity.

Today I Will Fly! and My Friend Is Sad. Hyperion, 2007, 58 pages (each).

Rattletrap Car: Review Haiku

Hey, it could be worse:
This thing could be up on blocks
in your neighbor's yard.

Rattletrap Car by Phyllis Root. Candlewick, 2001, 32 pages.

Note: As a rule, I'm not a fan of picture books heavy on the onomatopoeia (Mr. Brown, I'm looking at you). But this one has just the right mix of story, light rhyme, and sound effects. A current favorite of Munchkin and Niblet alike.

Happy Blogiversary to Me

Hey! I'm one year old!
Now if only I could stop
drooling on the keys.

emilyreads turns one today. It's also the day of the Munchkin's birthday party (third birthday, first party, Lord help me), so there will be little celebrating. Please note the new sidebar with The LIST of Important Books to read in the next year.

Anyway, hooray. Have a celebratory drink on me.

THREE: Birthday Haiku

What she can do now:
Negotiate, read (sort of).
What she can't: Obey.

Happy birthday, Munchkin. I love you.

The Invention of Hugo Cabret: Review Haiku

Clockwork tour-de-force!
But my inside pub marvels:
what production costs!

The Invention of Hugo Cabret by Brian Selznick. Scholastic, 2007, 544 pages.

Facelift

In preparation for my first blogiversary, I've made some changes to the template and tried (with much wailing and gnashing of teeth) to import a custom header. Please let me know what works and what sucks (and what browser you're using: I can't promise I can fix problems in anything other than IE7, but I can try).

Happy Easter.

Does this count as Poetry Friday?

I am the sonnet, never quickly thrilled; Not prone to overstated gushing praise Nor yet to seething rants and anger, filled With overstretched opinions to rephrase; But on the other hand, not fond of fools, And thus, not fond of people, on the whole; And holding to the sound and useful rules, Not those that seek unjustified control. I'm balanced, measured, sensible (at least, I think I am, and usually I'm right); And when more ostentatious types have ceased, I'm still around, and doing, still, alright. In short, I'm calm and rational and stable - Or, well, I am, as much as I am able. What Poetry Form Are You? Thanks to Fuse for the link.

Made to Stick: Review Haiku

Pop social science
wrapped in a kick-ass jacket.
Improve your message!


Made to Stick: Why Some Ideas Survive and Others Die by Chip Heath and Dan Heath. Random, 2007, 304 pages.

Twisted: Review Haiku

Nerd turned criminal
Gets noticed, but at what cost?
High school hell, served raw.


Twisted by Laurie Halse Anderson. Viking, 2007, 256 pages.

Fairest: Review Haiku

Your mother's Snow White?
Not hardly. The language sings;
the plot feels cluttered.

Fairest by Gail Carson Levine. Harper, 2007, 326 pages.

Apropo of nothing. . .

. . . but I'm still wiping spluttered (spattered? splattered?) coffee off my monitor.

http://godawfulweddingcrap.blogspot.com/

Also, I am so glad I'm already married.

Harmless: Review Haiku

"You've told lies before,
haven't you?" But these girls learn:
Consequences hurt.

Harmless by Dana Reinhardt. Lamb/Random, 2007, 229 pages.

The Thing About Georgie: Review Haiku

What's the thing about
Georgie? Little stuff, really.
A king-size debut.

The Thing About Georgie by Lisa Graff. Harper/Geringer, 2007, 220 pages.

The Famous MotherReader Interview Meme

I asked for it, I got it.

The universal questions:
1. What’s your favorite quote?
"Let me play the lion too."
There's a scene in A Midsummer Night's Dream where Peter Quince is assigning roles in the mechanicals' play, and Bottom keeps butting in, wanting to play every part -- including the lion, in this case. I have a bad habit of taking on too much and wanting to be all things to all people, so sometimes I need to remind myself that I don't have to be the lion, too.

Runner-up: "This too shall pass." Just as applicable when the children are sleeping angelically as when they're burning down the house.

2. How would you spend $1,500 that you won in a radio contest?
If I'm thinking short-term, I'd buy a kickass new laptop. If I'm thinking long-term, I'd stash it in my (as-yet-nonexistent) Going Back to Grad School Fund.

3. Where do you like to go to get away from it all?
The library. I just wish I could go there by myself more often (and not be on the clock). I also have a weakness for The Coffee Store, as we call it in my house. (Munchkin, spelling: "S-T-A-R-B-U-C-K-S. Coffee store!")

4. If you had the complete attention of everyone in the United States, but only for thirty seconds, what would you say?
"It's Feb-ROO-ary, nuke-LEE-er, and jew-EL-ry, people."

The personal question:
5. How are things going with the new baby and another little one at home?
It's more manageable than I thought, actually -- mostly because (knock knock knock on wood) the Munchkin seems to be entering a slightly more mature, slightly less infuriating stage, and because (KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK) Baby John is a wicked good sleeper. Also because I have reached a detente with the television set.

I love watching the two of them interact: her smothering him (literally) with love, and him staring in wonder at this loud, fascinating, possibly dangerous creature who keeps poking him. I also benefit from my longstanding position as Slag-Ass Mommy, so the little things (matching clothes, dry diapers, reasonably nutritious and varied food options) don't tend to concern me much. If the children are still alive by the end of the day, I've done my job.

Princess Justina Albertina: Horn-Tooting Haiku

Got a bratty kid?
Ready to pull your hair out?
Just try a gryphon.

Princess Justina Albertina: A Cautionary Tale by Ellen Dee Davidson, illustrated by Michael Chesworth. Charlesbridge, 2007, 32 pages.

Note: Since I seem to be incapable of finishing either of the books I'm currently reading (the educational but not exactly scintillating Great Tales From English History, Volume III and MBA in a Box*), I thought I'd shake things up by calling attention to a terrific recent book that I happened to work on. Enjoy.

* Step One: Cut a hole in a box.

Gauntlet, thrown: UPDATED PART DEUX!

I'm approaching my one-year blogiversary (4.14) and am thinking of setting A Goal of some sort. This seems to be a theme of mine since turning 30: the Yearly Big Book-ish Goal. In 2005 I decided to keep track of all the books I read in a year (150, plus at least 130 magazines and 365 newspapers); in 2006 I started this blog.

In 2007 I'm toying with the idea of reading or re-reading some Important Books: books that everyone seems to know about, books that I have often alluded to without actually having read, books that I read years ago but can't really speak intelligently about anymore. I figure if I can read 40 or 50 of these by next April, that wouldn't be too shabby. Here's my tentative list so far, in no particular order:

1. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
2. Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert
3. Charlotte's Web by E. B. White
4. Hatchet by Gary Paulsen
5. Wringer by Jerry Spinelli
6. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
7. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
8. Democracy in America by Alexis d'Tocqueville (I'll...uh...probably just skim this)
9. The Federalist Papers (skim this one, too)
10. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce
11. the Little House books by Laura Ingalls Wilder (some of them, at least)
12. Guns, Germs, and Steel by Jared Diamond
13. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl
14. The real Winnie-the-Pooh stories by A. A. Milne
15. Either The Iliad or The Odyssey, if I can find a good translation (I made it through The Inferno only because of Robert Pinsky) *Lee suggests Stanley Lombardo's translations.
16. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
17. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
18. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens (lo, how I hate Dickens)
19. Rabbit, Run by John Updike
20. The Mouse and His Child by Russell Hoban
21. Octavian Nothing by M. T. Anderson (whatever the full title is; too lazy to look up)
22. Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov
23. A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
24. The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C. S. Lewis
25. The Screwtape Letters by C. S. Lewis
26. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
27. Jacob Have I Loved by Katherine Paterson
28. Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
29. A View from Saturday by E. L. Konigsburg
30. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
31. Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
32. On the Road by Jack Kerouac
33. Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
34. Forever by Judy Blume
35. A Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood
36. A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole
37. Breakfast at Tiffany's by Truman Capote
38. The Autobiography of Malcolm X by Alex Haley
39. Lord of the Flies by William Golding
40. Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder (thanks, g elliot)
41. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith (thanks, bookbk)
42. Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut (thanks, bookbk)
43. Personal History by Katharine Graham
44. Staying Fat For Sarah Byrnes by Chris Crutcher
45. I Am the Cheese by Robert Cormier
46. The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
47. James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
48. Annie on My Mind by Nancy Garden
49. Where the Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls (might not be able to finish due to uncontrollable sobbing)
50. The Outsiders by S. E. Hinton
51. A Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula K. LeGuin
52. Decline and Fall by Evelyn Waugh.

Okay, looking at that list makes me sweat a little. Suggestions for other titles?

UPDATE: I think that's gotta be it. Now I just have to read everything in my TBR pile before April 14, and I'll be all set. . . . yeah. At some point I'll try to make this a sidebar, so I can track my progress. Unless that makes me want to cry. (The coding or the tracking, either one.)

Spelldown: Review Haiku

Daddy drinks too much;
Mama works too much. Karlene?
C-H-A-M-P.

Spelldown: The Big-Time Dreams of a Small-Town Word Whiz by Karen Luddy. S&S, 2007, 211 pages.

I'm Feeling Lonely...

...so I'm doing a meme even though no one tagged me. This one's stolen from MotherReader, who stole it from Big A little a, who stole it from The Miss Rumphius Effect. (Okay, "stealing" is perhaps perjorative.)

1. What are your five most important books?
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. THE Great American Novel.
Anastasia Krupnik by Lois Lowry. Anastasia is the reason I live in Massachusetts.
The Westing Game by Ellen Raskin. Made me want to be a writer. (A very, very bad writer, as it turned out.)
The Complete Works of Shakespeare, Riverside edition. What I did in college.
My Life and Hard Times by James Thurber. First time I realized that grownup books could be funny, too.

2. What is an important book you admit you haven’t read?
For someone who claims to be a big reader, the number of important books I haven't read is rather staggering. Let's just say for now that I've never read any Gary Paulsen and I've never read any of the big Russian novelists (Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, etc.).

3. What classic (or childhood favorite) was a little disappointing on rereading?
The Westing Game was one of my two Big Childhood Books (Superfudge was the other). Rereading it as an adult was not in itself disappointing -- it's still a kickass book, and I still want that t-shirt -- but the context in which I read it was. I reread this for my first and only book club meeting, an informal group of Boston-based children's book people, and the rest of them all hated it. They thought it was too gimmicky, too coincidental, too transparent in its plotting. Granted, we read it along with the other Newbery books from that year -- The Slave Dancer by Paula Fox and M.C. Higgins the Great by Virginia Hamilton -- so I could understand somewhat how a semi-comic contemporary mystery would seem less impressive in context. But still. I sort of felt like somebody stabbed my puppy.

4. What book do you (or did you) care most about sharing with your kids?
I'm so glad my daughter loves Click Clack Moo, the oeuvre of Mo, and the Lilly books. I am excited to read her Charlotte's Web and the aforementioned Westing Game. (I assume my son will love books, too -- he just hasn't articulated his tastes yet.)

5. Name an acclaimed book, either classic or contemporary, that you just don’t like.
King Dork by Frank Portman. Hated it. I am also lukewarm about Goodnight Moon, though I confess it is/has been the first regular bedtime book for both of my children. Freaky, ugly-ass rabbits aside, there's something lulling about that text that's unmatched by any other book I've tried.

What Would MacGyver Do?: Review Haiku

Give me some duct tape,
a paper clip, and a sock:
I'll make you a book.

What Would MacGyver Do? True Stories of Improvised Genius in Everyday Life compiled by Brendan Vaughan. Hudson Street Press, 2006, 196 pages.

Lily B. on the Brink of Paris: Review Haiku

Cabot wannabe,
but charming in her own right.
Vive la Lily!

Lily B. on the Brink of Paris by Elizabeth Cody Kimmel. Harper, 2006, 192 pages.

Freedom Riders: Review Haiku

Fascinating look
at brave people under fire.
Ugly-ass design.

Freedom Riders: John Lewis and Jim Zwerg on the Front Lines of the Civil Rights Movement by Ann Bausum. National Geographic Society, 2006, 79 pages.

The Higher Power of Lucky: Review Haiku

Are you my mother?
Orphaned Lucky seeks and finds.
SCROTUM! (made you look)

The Higher Power of Lucky by Susan Patron. Atheneum, 2006, 134 pages.

Cupcake: Review Haiku

I had forgotten
how tiresome teen angst could be.
Does that make me old?

Cupcake by Rachel Cohn. S&S, 2007, 248 pages.