I Am Not Joey Pigza: Review Haiku

Call DCFS!
Get pal Joey away from
his superflake dad!

I Am Not Joey Pigza by Jack Gantos. FSG, 2007, 224 pages.

Note: Off to the beach for a weeklong vacation. Lots of reading, probably little posting.


I hereby relinquish my haiku crown

HP7, in haiku. (Warning: spoilers a-plenty, though they're poetic.)


Does My Head Look Big in This? Review Haiku

Love the concept, but
message heavy-handed, voice
After-School Special.

Does My Head Look Big in This? by Randa Adbel-Fattah. Orchard, 2007, 360 pages.

Apropo of nothing: I'm not sure whether to be proud or alarmed that I'm the only one who seems to have finished/reviewed HP7 yesterday. Where are the rest of you? No one else I know has finished it, and I'M DYING TO TALK ABOUT IT!


Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Review Haiku

That, Mr. Snicket,
is what I call an ending.
I couldn't believe --

Oh, sorry, I ran out of syllables.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J. K. Rowling. Scholastic, 2007, 759 pages.


Charlotte's Web: Review Haiku

"No one was with her
when she died." I'm sorry -- I
can't see the keyboard . . .

Charlotte's Web by E. B. White. Harper, 1952, 184 pages.
#12 on The LIST.


Does this mean Fuse and I are long-lost sisters?

You're Catch-22!

by Joseph Heller

Incredibly witty and funny, you have a taste for irony in all that you
see. It seems that life has put you in perpetually untenable situations, and your sense
of humor is all that gets you through them. These experiences have also made you an
ardent pacifist, though you present your message with tongue sewn into cheek. You
could coin a phrase that replaces the word "paradox" for millions of

Take the Book Quiz at the Blue Pyramid.

Guess this means I have to read it next.


The Off Season: Review Haiku

Midwestern gumption
beats tragedy any time.
I heart D. J. Schwenk.

The Off Season by Catherine Gilbert Murdock. HMCo, 2007, 277 pages.


Princess on the Brink: Review Haiku

Dear Ms. Meg Cabot:
Why, oh why can't I quit you?
Nice sex message, though.

Princess on the Brink: Princess Diaries, Volume 8. Harper, 2006, 256 pages.

Rabbit, Run: Review Haiku

Tried fifty pages
until it was obvious:
Updike hates women.

Rabbit, Run by John Updike. Knopf, 1960, 320 pages, of which I read 54.

#11 on The LIST.

(P.S. 200th post!)


Decline and Fall: Review Haiku

Absurdity, the
upper-class way. Don't look for
morals, chum; just laugh.

Decline and Fall by Evelyn Waugh. Little Brown, 1928, 293 pages.

#10 on The LIST. (Hooray! One-fifth of the way through the list, only three months into . . . oh, wait, that sucks.)


Bridge to Terabithia: Review Haiku

The truest, saddest
portrait of childhood grief. Hail,

Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson. Avon, 1978, 160 pages.

#9 on The LIST.

Listened to on a Playaway device until the middle of the last chapter, when the battery died and I couldn't figure out how to open the case to replace it.


Converting Kate: Review Haiku

Childhood circumscribed
by fundamentalism;
yet Kate still has guts.

Converting Kate by Beckie Weinheimer. Viking, 2007, 312 pages.

Dude, I must be an A-list blogger now

. . . because suddenly I'm getting comment spam. Can't seem to delete it, though I'll keep trying.


The Federalist Papers: Review Haiku

"Justice is the end
of government." Our prescient
founders said it best.

The Federalist Papers by James Madison, Alexander Hamilton, and John Jay. First published 1788. Bantam, 1982, 624 pages.

#8 on The LIST.

Happy Independence Day! (And yes, I totally cheated and didn't read them all. But I did read numbers 10, 51, 67, 68, and 69, which my husband the gov jock told me* are the most important. So sue me.)

There. Bite me, honey.

The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing: Review Haiku

Expectations: low.
First two hundred pages: meh.
But oh -- that ending!

#7 on The LIST.


Jack Plank Tells Tales: Review Haiku

Natalie Babbit
can do no wrong. Still, this one
feels a bit bloodless.

Jack Plank Tells Tales by Natalie Babbit. Michael diCapua (FSG), 2007, 128 pages.



Online Dating

Apparently my only problem words are "kill" (used twice) and "suck" (used once, but I think they're not counting correctly).


So Totally Emily Ebers: Review Haiku

Setting aside the
thrice-told tale bit, this is a
funny, real-world read.

So Totally Emily Ebers by Lisa Yee. Scholastic, 2007, 280 pages.