Happy blogiversary to me: Birthday Haiku

You'd think at some point
this would grow tiresome.
Fortunately, it hasn't.

(Also, those of you who know me IRL will understand why I'm amused that the traditional gift for the fifth anniversary is wood.)

SEVEN: Birthday Haiku

Don't let her fool you:
she's got the attitude of
a fifteen-year-old.

The Popularity Papers, Book 2: Review Haiku

Don't know how she found
my junior-high diary,

but this is spot-on.

The Popularity Papers, Book Two: The Long-Distance Dispatch Between Lydia Goldblatt and Julie Graham-Chang by Amy Ignatow. Amulet, 2011, 208 pages.

Love My Rifle More Than You: Review Haiku

Affecting look at
the bitches and sluts* who
bravely serve our country.

Love My Rifle More Than You: Young and Female in the U. S. Army by Kayla Williams. Norton, 2005, 290 pages.

*Her words, not mine. Relax.

Close to Famous: Review Haiku

Behold the power
of small-town resilience and
a well-timed cupcake.

Close to Famous by Joan Bauer. Viking, 2011, 200 pages.

Theater Geek: Review Haiku

Broadway babies shine,

but little errors reduce

credibility.*

Theater Geek: The Real-Life Drama of a Summer at Stagedoor Manor, the Famous Performing Arts Camp by Mickey Rapkin. Free Press, 2010, 220 pages.

* Ahem. The giant in Act Two of Into the Woods is not a he. The repeated lyrics in "Being Alive" begin "Someone to" or "Somebody," but never "Somebody to." All the campers would know this.

The Lemonade Crime: Review Haiku

Justice, fourth-grade style:
Siblings close the book on bully's
reign of terror.

The Lemonade Crime by Jacqueline Davies. HMH, 2011, 160 pages.

True (. . . Sort of): Review Haiku

Troublemaker Delly
keeps her head and heart intact
and saves the day.

True ( . . . Sort Of) by Katherine Hannigan. Greenwillow, 2011, 368 pages.

Beauty Queens: Review Haiku

Harsh critique of
corporate myths of womanhood in
kick-ass Libba style.

Beauty Queens by Libba Bray. Scholastic, 2011, 400 pages.

The Trouble with Chickens: Review Haiku

Canine gumshoe doesn't
look for trouble, but nonetheless
finds chickens.

The Trouble with Chickens by Doreen Cronin. Balzer + Bray, 2011, 128 pages.

Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother: Review Haiku

Cautionary tale
or instruction manual?
You be the judge, Mom.

Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua. Penguin, 2011, 240 pages.

Okay for Now: Review Haiku

Hard-luck kid finds art,
love, and redemption in oddly
convenient ways.

Okay for Now by Gary D. Schmidt. Clarion, 2011, 368 pages.

Half Baked: Review Haiku

Surprisingly funny
memoir of micropreemie
and her mother.

Half Baked: The Story of My Nerves, My Newborn, and How We Both Learned to Breathe by Alexa Stevenson. Running Press, 2010, 297 pages.

P. S. I don't know why all my posts this week are baby-related. I'm not trying to tell you anything, really.

The Panic Virus: Review Haiku

When fear trumps science,
everybody loses. Now please
jab my kids more.

The Panic Virus: A True Story of Medicine, Science, and Fear by Seth Mnookin. S&S, 2011, 448 pages.

Good Eggs: Review Haiku

Brutally honest
memoir on love, anxiety,
and (not) babies.

Good Eggs by Phoebe Potts. Harper, 2010, 272 pages.

Stuck in the Middle: Review Haiku

Stories don't really
go anywhere -- but OH,

the humiliation.

Stuck in the Middle: 17 Comics from an Unpleasant Age edited by Ariel Schrag. Viking, 2007, 210 pages.

Withering Tights: Review Haiku

It's utterly ridiculous,
but would you expect
anything less?

Withering Tights by Louise Rennison. Harper, 2011, 288 pages.

Foiled: Review Haiku

Fencing prodigy
meets cute boy-slash-troll, and now
must defend the Queen.

Foiled by Jane Yolen, illustrated by Mike Cavallaro. First Second, 2010, 160 pages.

Now give me your money.

ATTENSHUN PLEAZ: As of 5:00pm today, I am the proud owner of one mint-condition MBA.

Now to find the critical path to the bar.

Fever Crumb: Review Haiku

Post-tech dystopia
finds orphan Engineer
searching for meaning.

Fever Crumb by Philip Reeve. Scholastic, 2010, 325 pages.

P.S. Powell's lists a single subject: "sex role." WTF?